Love (and Hate) Letters

Dear Fullerton Horse Trails:

I love you. My Saturday morning run with Kenny was magical – reminiscent of my run on down your paths on Thanksgiving. Even though you occasionally have heaping piles of horse poop in my way or are occasionally really muddy, you beat the treadmill hands down, any day.

One thing, though. While I love the vegetation that lines your path (the sight and smell is divine), is it totally necessary for it to be of the variety that causes rashes and itchiness? You see, although there are signs posted everywhere instructing the mountain-bikers to yield to runners, the bikers (in their self-perceived superiority) never yield and I find my self running for cover into said rash-inducing plants. (I’m no match for their bikes with their shocks and huge tires.) Anyway, after being ran off the road into your poison laden plants I have to then high-step while running so that I can scratch my shins and calves. It’s kind of awkward and a bit of a downer on what would otherwise be a beautiful work-out. Also, I don't look very good in skirts after these encounters.

Anyway, it’s just a suggestion. I still love you.

-Jill


Dear Fullerton Mountain Bikers:

You suck.

-Jill

The boy I like...

It's pretty rad when the boy you like surprises you with flowers upon your return from a vacation with your mom and sisters...

...but it's even more rad when the boy you like surprises you with the totally ridiculous red,gold, and silver sequined caplet/poncho thing you've been quietly obsessing over since you first saw it in your local thrift store so that you can finally realize your inner disco queen...

...and I am a disco queen.

Bad Products

I'm not gonna lie. This thing creeps me out.

(The product, not the baby. It's $79 price tag creeps me out, too.)

If doctors checked for prostate cancer mammogram style, I’m pretty sure some guy would have invented better technology already. Something that didn’t involve flattening already sensitive body parts to the size of pancakes.

I’m just sayin’.

These thoughts come to you courtesy of a conversation I had earlier today on the perils of pap smears – after having had to endure one this morning. Least. Favorite. Thing. EVER. (Which is probably why it’s taken me almost six years since my last one to schedule this procedure.) Calling all ladies: why do we just accept this brutality and torture?! Rise up, I say, and demand better! Something less...violating! Less uncomfortable! Less awkward for all involved!

(Sigh.)

BTW – Poor Husband sat in on one such procedure recently. The look on his face almost made the whole procedure worth it. Almost.

The post with lots o' links (and Side Notes)

Awww. Check it out: my little broski made it out to party with the Mammoth Men.  It was his birthday - the big 24 - on Monday.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RYAN! Side note #1: how awesome is it that Kenny called Ryan on Monday, not to wish him a happy day (because Kenny forgot), but to invite him out to party.  I think Kenny made it up to him though.  (Nate Kaiser of The Image is Found set up his epic Crazybooth at the party for these photos.  All sorts of shenanigans ensued.)

Here's Ryan...I'm glad his eyes are closed.
Side note #2: These darts were a Christmas gift to Kenny from Skyler and Elise.  I can't even begin to tell you how badly he wanted these.  Good to see they're getting some good use in Park City this week. I warn you, these are not safe-for-children darts.  They are fast and they hurt.  The first time we used them one guy ended up in his underwear covered in welts and someone else almost lost an eye. (Sorry about that, Ashlyn.  I really wasn't even aiming for your face.) Moving on. 

My favorite artist, Colt Bowden, also showed up to party, and brought along his cutie girlfriend, Abi. (Side note #3: I've never read about two people more smitten with each other than these two.  WOW.) Side note #4: check out Colt's art here or here or buy some for yourself here.  He's amazing.  Seriously. Ah-MAZE-ing. 

Side note #5: I really miss Kenny.  (But I'm glad he's having fun.)

I just hope he comes back whole...

Financial Speak

I came across this little linguistic gem today while reviewing the notes to a public company’s 10-K (which is an incredibly detailed annual financial report, for all you non-business people):

“[Company] recognized an other-than-temporary impairment loss...”

'Other-than-temporary'? How's that for efficiency. Is the fact that this phrase translates to, oh I don't know, say permanent / forever / everlasting / not-coming-back lost on anyone? Really?

(Work is pretty dry at times and I have to find entertainment somewhere, right? However, I kind of wish financial statements would just stay un-amusing. It would make my job easier...)

Mammoth Men 4

Remember last year when Kenny went on a snowboarding trip to Mammoth with a bunch of professional photographers?  And because Kenny was the only non-photographer he became the model and I got all sorts of fantastic photos of him?  Well the crew is at it again - this time to Park City, UT.  The vacation has morphed from a quick guys trip to a sponsored event with its own official site where everyone can follow The Mammoth Men during their trip. Make sure you check it out; in addition to viewing great photography, you might even  get a chance to win some rad stuff.

Here's some of today's shots of Kenny. I might be a little biased, but I think he's pretty dreamy...

Shots directly above and below taken by Mark Brooke.
Of course Kenny had to get in on this action (from left: Hudd, Mark, and Kenny; photo by Nate Kaiser).

Again, check out Mammothmen.com - it's guaranteed to provide entertainment, or at least a fun break in your day.  (And check out some of their sponsors - there's some great companies and products listed.)

That's all - I'm done plugging their trip.  

Okay, I'm probably not done, but I am going to bed now ('cause someone's gotta get up early and go to work to pay the bills!). Good night!

Weekend of the Dead - the good part.

For the weekend of my grandmother's funeral, Kenny and I had planned to be in Utah anyway - to visit Kenny's Dad, Ken, and his wife Kristee. Fortunately we were still able to spend a day with them - and had a great time!  Good food, good company, a beautiful drive up Snow Canyon, and some fun with Ken's new automated lift.  I've mentioned before that Kenny's dad has ALS and is steadily losing muscle control...this contraption will help lift him out of bed when he is no longer able to do it himself.  (I have to add that I was amazed at Kristee's strength! Helping Ken get in and out of cars and chairs these last few months has left her looking pretty fit!) Anyway, Kenny and Steven built the Lift while we there - and I got to test it out. FUN!  

I felt a little like a beached whale...in a good way (whatever that means).  Below, Kristee figures out how to control the machine.  Thankfully she gave me a pretty smooth ride.
Kenny and his Dad hamming it up and enjoying themselves.  And, in case you're wondering, the boys did a good job building this - we didn't drop anyone.
As a side note, we really made this trip a Weekend of the Dead (and dying), albeit unintentionally.  While on our scenic drive we passed a memorial and stopped to get a closer look. The memorial was honoring those killed at the Mountain Meadows Massacre.  It was pretty humbling to say the least.  The reverence of the visit was broken only by Kenny's urgent need to relieve his bladder...don't worry - we didn't deface any graves (he held it like a good boy). Unfortunately some other human-scum took care of that already by scratching several choice words into the memorial.  Awesome.  Once again, humanity makes me proud. (Insert disgusted sigh here. Moving on.)

Thanks again Ken and Kristee for the fun day.  It was great to see you - hopefully next time we'll be able to stay longer!