Friday, August 29, 2008

Attention all Middle-Aged Businessmen:

Please stop.
Stop what? Stop wearing these:
Despite whatever you tell yourself, you still look like this:
and that is not a good thing.

This is not appropriate attire unless you are in Hawaii or on a cruise – and even then you’re still precariously close to “extreme tackiness,” having already crossed the simply “cheesy” line upon purchasing this item. Hawaiian shirt + slacks + dress shoes will never look good, or even presentable – even on Casual Fridays. I don’t know when this became the standard Friday uniform for millions of Southern CA professional men, but it needs to stop. Like, now. You are not Bob Hope and you are not a Beach Boy. At least move on to boxy polo shirts. My point is that the Hawaiian shirt is long since over, if it ever was, in fact, "in." (Actually... seemed to make a brief comeback among preppy/jock boys while I was in high school, but I was living in Provo, UT; thus , by the very nature of the dominant demographics of that area, this does not count as a legitimate fashion “comeback.” Did the come-back happen only in Utah?) Anyway, I'm not advocating that you dress "in style" nor do I support the notion there is one style that rules the others. The point is that I can’t even ride the train or comfortably enter the break room on Fridays with so many of you crammed into such a small space. The clashing colors/prints are seizure-inducing. For the sake of anyone who has to interact with you – especially professionally – please make this stop. Thank you.

11 comments:

Justin + kelly said...

AMEN!! I think Utah took the biggest hit of that fad back in the day, but was not the only place. On a side note, I think the perfect store for Kenny is here in OZ. From what Ive seen on the blog, his fashion sense would love this store.

Amy said...

I seriously don't remember that come back at all, maybe you should name names so I can visualize it better. I do however remember my dad wearing one to the Beach boy Stadium of fire concert when I was 8, and so I am always reminded of that when I see those shirts.

Emily said...

Ha! My dad totally wears one of these at least 3 times a week. He also wears a patchwork leather vest, a beret, and at times, a lace-up tunic. (Man, I love him so much!) So I guess what I'm saying is, it could get worse.

Kat Clark said...

I am in love with this post. Could you be any funnier?! I look forward to finding out. Anyway, I experienced "casual Friday" everyday in Hawaii, even at church on Sunday. It is, as you say, "seizure inducing." That may be the one and only thing I don't miss about Hawaii.

Kelli and/or Kyle said...

I remember that comeback. Grant totally sported the hawaiian shirts. And my just barely former boss still does. I liked it because then I felt free to wear anything I felt like and count is as professional.

Elise said...

I don't ever remember a comeback...they were never cool. But check out the clothes of a plane full of people flying to Hawaii!...so sad. Casual Fridays are a bad idea, they give people permission to wear bad clothes.

Freddy and Mandy said...

Ha! Love it!

Kory said...

They just want you to see their 'crazy' side! It's a very daring fashion statement that apparently needs to be said.

lindsay said...

hey jill --long time! i noticed your comment on my sis' Al's blog and thought I'd say hello! I'm sad we weren't at newport this summer for my annual jill and kenny fix. hope you're doing well.

heather said...

haha! i totally agree with you. i don't get it. everytime ryan sees one of these horrible outfits walking around, he asks, "did you just get back from a jimmy buffet concert?"

it's all jimmy's fault.

allegra said...

i used to see this all the time in utah and idaho when i lived there. thankfully there aren't many in boston or arizona.

amen to this post!! you're too funny!